Losing your phone, keys, or wallet is a common frustration for adults with ADHD. But for many, it's the priceless, irreplaceable items that go missing - causing heartbreak and shame.In a recent survey, ADDitude readers shared their most devastating stories of misplaced treasures. From lost engagement rings to forgotten work credit cards, these tales highlight the real-world consequences of ADHD-related forgetfulness and disorganization.

"I lost my most beloved possession: my grandmother's engagement ring. I never found it and can never replace it. I still feel sick over the loss," one reader shared.

Another lost contact with a dear friend after misplacing their phone number when returning from living abroad.While the items themselves hold sentimental or practical value, the emotional toll of losing them can be even greater. Many readers expressed feelings of shame, guilt, and even permanent damage to their self-confidence and peace of mind.

"When I constantly lose little things, I feel like I am losing my mind. I lose so much precious time constantly looking for things that I just had in my hands a moment ago," said Faith from Virginia.

The Science Behind Losing Things with ADHD

So why do people with ADHD struggle so much with misplacing items? It comes down to the core symptoms of the disorder - inattention, impulsivity, and poor working memory.

"When you have ADHD, you have trouble focusing your attention and keeping it focused," explains Roberto Olivardia, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and lecturer at Harvard Medical School. "Your mind is constantly being pulled in different directions. "This lack of sustained attention makes it difficult to encode where you last placed an item into your memory. "You're not really registering where you put your keys or your phone because your mind is already on to the next thing," Olivardia says.

Impulsivity also plays a role. "You might be in a rush to get out the door and just toss your keys somewhere without thinking," he notes. And weak working memory means you may not be able to easily recall where you left an item, even moments later.

Strategies to Prevent Losing Things

While losing important items is common with ADHD, there are strategies to help minimize misplacing them:

1. Designate a "home" for frequently used items. Keep keys, wallet, phone, etc. in the same spot every time you come home. Preferably, keep similar items together in the area where they are used most often.
2. Create a "launch pad" near your front door. Use a tray, bowl, or hook system to corral essentials like keys, wallet, and sunglasses before heading out.
3. Attach Bluetooth trackers to important items. Devices like Tile or Chipolo can be paired with your phone to make lost items ring, or to locate them on a map. Some even work in reverse to make your phone ring if you've misplaced it.
4. Use visual cues. Put brightly colored tape on remote controls, use a unique keychain, or choose a bold phone case. Distinctive looks make items easier to spot.
5. Narrate your actions. When putting something down, say out loud "I'm putting my keys on the kitchen counter." The verbal cue helps cement the memory.
6. Scan the room before leaving. Make it a habit to do a quick visual sweep of your space to ensure you have everything you need.
7. Tidy up at the end of each day. Take a few minutes to return items to their designated homes. Clutter and piles make it easier for things to get lost.

When Losing Things Becomes a Problem

While misplacing items is common with ADHD, it becomes problematic when it starts to significantly impact your life. If you're constantly late because you can't find your keys, missing important appointments, or losing valuables on a regular basis, it may be time to get additional support.

"If losing things is causing you a lot of distress, impacting your relationships or your work, or making you feel really bad about yourself, that's a sign to get help," says Olivardia.

Strategies like those above can make a big difference. But for some, more intensive organization coaching or therapy may be needed to develop the skills and habits to keep track of belongings. Medication can also help by improving focus and impulse control.The key is not to beat yourself up.

"Losing things is not a character flaw," Olivardia emphasizes. "It's a symptom of ADHD that can be managed with the right strategies and support."

Real Stories of Lost Treasures

While the stories shared by ADDitude readers are heartbreaking, they also highlight the resilience of the ADHD community. Many found ways to cope and move forward, even after devastating losses. One reader, Luann from Texas, shared how she lost a $30,000 check at her job as a bank teller - a mistake that triggered a nervous breakdown.

"The check was found by my supervisor, and no harm was done to the customer or the bank. But the shame and mental anguish caused permanent damage to me."

Another reader, Adam from Georgia, lost a $680 tarp on the job as a flatbed trucker. "They absolutely deducted it from my pay," he said.

While the financial hit stung, he kept going. And despite the heartbreak of losing her grandmother's ring, one reader found solace in the memories it held.

"I still feel sick over the loss. But I have the memories of my grandmother wearing it and how much it meant to her."

The takeaway? Losing important items is painful, but it doesn't have to define you. With the right strategies and self-compassion, it's possible to minimize the frequency and impact of misplaced belongings. And when the worst happens, leaning on support systems and cherished memories can help you move forward.

Key Takeaways

• Losing priceless, irreplaceable items is a common struggle for adults with ADHD
• It's caused by core ADHD symptoms like inattention, impulsivity, and poor working memory
• Strategies like designated "homes" for items, Bluetooth trackers, and end-of-day tidying can help
• When losing things causes significant distress or disruption, it may be time to seek additional support
• With the right coping strategies and self-compassion, it's possible to minimize the impact of misplaced belongings